Monday, March 14, 2016

B Movie Trailer Reviews (Bring Back The Funny)

So, I want to review really bad movie/miniseries trailers, like those Hallmark ones, they're so amusingly bad.

Up first, 'Supernova'.

After the trailer, you're probably thinking about all those natural disaster movies that came out in the 2000s. What were they thinking? Oh, I know what they were thinking, they wanted to cash-in on all that world ending hysteria and paranoia, paranoia-porn. It seems like everyone likes to watch a car-wreck, or something they don't have to take responsibility for, so they would enjoy a balls-to-the-walls disaster movie. I don't, because I care about human life. So, when little CGI men get blown up, or thrown here and there, I still maintain empathy and compassion for them, even though they're just pixels..or dolls, or pillows. I don't know.

I actually fell asleep during this trailer, but I think Tea Carrere is in it, the chick from Wayne's World 2, excellent! Never saw her in anything else. I heard she was in a TV show called Relic Raider or something, never saw it. Why would I? When it comes to ancient history type of drama/action shows, they might as well play them in schools, since the information is probably as accurate as what they teach anyway. Dinosaurs built the pyramids, sure, sounds about right. Anyway, back to this thing, I bet Peter Fonda regrets being in this, he looks really good for his age and it's a pity he doesn't make any larger movies. Whatever that means nowadays, I guess just bigger budget, or bigger distribution. Ya know what? Forget it, he's more interesting not making mainstream movies. Anyone would be.

I guess the premiss of the movie is....uh...hmm, the sun is going supernova and it's going to fry Earth or something..and they are going to stop this? I don't know. I kept focusing on the font they used for the titles and how basic it looked, and it really pulled me out of it. It ruined the appeal of 'Supernova' to me, so much! It just made me, of course not. Seeing Peter Fonda made me somewhat interested actually, but all the other actors, the fillers, were not that impressive. At first I was thinking, with this trailer, people see the title 'Supernova' and they may ponder, "is that an asteroid or something?" Someone else chimes in, "no, it's a comet, idiot!" Okay, so it's a star exploding. To people reading this, I don't mean to undermine your intelligence, I merely meant your parents.

So, most casual viewers would fast-forward to the mayhem anyway. And then lose interest because the special effects sucked. Playing badminton would be better than this movie.

1/2 Exploding Star rating for this trailer. The half of the star goes to Fonda, not Luke Perry, or the other person.

Next is 'Lies and Illusions'. Ain't it the truth?

This trailer's just, really-really silly. Christian Bale's just bailing at acting here. I mean, Christian Slater. I love the guy, but he just kind of adds nothing to this bad movie. There's this scene where he's been shot and he's like, SPOILER "ahhh, this hurts so much, owwwe". Pretty awful/brilliant actually. Not awfully brilliant, just so..yeah, you know what I mean. Cuba Gooding Jr.'s in it, but you'll probably not realize it's him because his acting has gone down the shitter.

I actually watched this movie expecting it to be silly, and it wasn't as much as I'd like, it was too dramatic and just boring. The trailer is the best part. Love the announcer, "Lies-and-Illusions". Everything's an illusion. The truth, is it arbitrary? Hmm. The movie title really makes you think, not the movie though.

Still love Slater and his Slaterisms, and his overacting, totally unneeded. And thinking about him in a relationship in this movie just doesn't seem appropriate for children. Rated R. Because Slater does not mince words. Give the guy a better role! He's in Corey Feldman territory now. Why do really unpopular actors bother acting? Did they not invest their money? Why humiliate yourself? Play positive roles for younger people out there at least.

The shittiest thing is when an actor who once did profound and inspiring roles turns into an actor who plays completely immoral and scumbaggy roles.

I'm speaking to you Sir Ben Kingsley. You played Gandhi for crying out loud, now you play like the sleaziest roles. Acting range? Hardly.

Okay. Onto something else, 'Jules Verne's Mysterious Island'. Another Hallmark one. Bound to be amazing.

Speaking of someone who looks like Ben Kingsley, Patrick Stewart. I love this guy, he's the king of memes. If you haven't see one of them then..


That facepalm, seriously, we've had enough of it now. But it's the nicest possible way to show your disappointment in someone...without being a total jerkoff.

Anyway, him in a bathtub, as a lobster, classic.

 patrick stewart halloween lobster costume daily

Duh. Did this need a description? Sorry, how redundant.

On to the movie! Well, it's a two parter, it's uh, it's a miniseries. Some of the special effects are actually pretty good. I'm not even done watching the full experience of it's excellence, but how about I review just the trailer, which I'm going to watch right now. Okay. One sec. Hahaha. That fake looking corpse of a pirate...and the girl screaming...oh man. Already got my attention. I think the set design is really good. Love what's his face, what's his face? Uh. Everything's big. Nemo builds an atomic bomb, oh man, the atomic age and all of that, uhhahhhhhh. Gabrielle Anwar, who the eff is that? Omar Gooding, Cuba Gooding Jr.s brother right? Is that racist? He could be white and I'd say that. Is this trailer over yet? PIRATES! Women running, always like to see that. Keeping fit. Romance, then, a bit of a morality lesson going on there, sex without love equals violence. Nemo speaking of god, do not believe a word he says. Oh, it's over now.

So, that was me watching that trailer and commenting on it as I watched it, in case you didn't realize that already. Scene by scene. I can hear you yawning. Shrugs.

What the eff is his name? Uh, I think it even said it in the trailer maybe. It's like MacDonald or something. I need to find out. One sec again. Kyle MacLachlan! There we go. He's awesome. He looks great too, so does Pat Stewart. And the sets, they look good. So, SPOILERS this girl gets grabbed by a giant crow and it looks so..bahhd. But it has charm, in being bad. Some effects look better than others and I don't even like CGI. I guess they had a board meeting, which went something like this, "some effects, more of the budget will be spent on, others...not so much". So it's a total mixed bag. I think the giant scorpion looks pretty rad.

Oh, it was directed by Russel Mulcahy now. (No idea who that is).

I watched an interview with Kyle MacLachlan about his role in this movie, which isn't on YouTube. He's pretty serious about the movie and it's like, ah shucks, who are you fooling? It's cute and it made me giggle. Can't post it though. Also, the Patrick Stewart interview is pretty good, because he's so cavalier. He knows the movie is a piece of shit.

Sunday, January 10, 2016

The Duality Game


Good and evil, black and white, left and right, two dimensional thinking. This is limiting to some. This duality mindset is what has kept humanity from consciously evolving.

The sad part is that the "good" side portrayed by the mainstream media kill and go about things in an incorrect way, this is the fake good force. The false light is a major distraction and that phrase is mostly directed at so-called spiritual groups who manipulate others' beliefs and try to get them to invest energy in fighting an opposing side to some spiritual battle, or taking sides to a futile war basically. There may be one, but it will always be for your energy. Higher good, higher love and higher learning in one's development brings you back to your natural state of being. So fighting makes no sense at all.

War, this has to be done away with to help the human race live gracefully and without hate, greed and disharmony. On the other hand, the controlling, manipulative force wants to do away with war eventually as well as religion for purposes that don't serve humanity, just themselves. This planet is under bad management and it's up to the people to take it back and move it in a proper direction. I tear up thinking about how people in this world could be so much more loving and good than they are, since this seems like a far-fetched idea.

For us who are tired of waiting for positive change to occur on this planet, we've all probably grown weary of this place and resort to our meditation and living in the moment, since the universe lives in the moment, so why shouldn't we? We live in a free-will zone and strange things can happen in a free-will zone, but mostly the controllers of this planet want to keep people thinking on basic one and two dimensional terms.

Love those who are confused, the backwards and twisted morally, or just twisted and have no morals and love those who are weak and poor and who know no better because of ignorance, though they have love and are needing to share their love with others. Love them all, good or bad and everything in between, up close if they are friendly, but from a distance if they are not. Ask yourself, what does my heart and intuition tell me to do? What does my higher mind ask of me? Can you communicate change to others? Can you talk to your higher self? Maybe relay to people who dwell in lower energy that they will be okay and supported if they embrace positive change. Would you tear up while reading this because the thought of a world of peace and embracing love and giving others your love and higher energy would be a beautiful and important thing?

I love all of you. Not to sound New Agey, since that's another deception, but I hope we can higher our vibrations this new year. Not by living in the future-tense, but by accepting the moment as everything and the divine presence of higher love as the utmost importance and to not be trapped in dualist thinking by not focusing all of our energy on the life-game, the illusionary world shown on TV which lies and pits good and bad up against each other to hijack our minds and our energy. While the good portrayed on-screen are actually bad and it's mostly degrees of bad shown, it's just a distraction and they refuse to show the true good and what the bad force actually is.

You know what goodness is when you read other beings' energy. The same goes with the bad. If you have trouble doing this, try to higher your vibration by being at peace somewhere at least once a day, you can do this in your mind by focusing on the love you are receiving. Breathing in love and breathing out love is the way of nature.

Don't lack dimensions to your thinking. Stay or become a creative and loving individual and nurture it in others. ♡♡♡

Music to raise your vibes.

Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Talk Talk - Talk Talk

Less talk, more love action. XXOO ♡ ♡ ♡

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

An Apology (Finally)

I forgive you. If you stop with your cellphone masturbation.

Which reminds me, this girl sat down beside me on the train, she started to text and I'm thinking, is this your version of flirting with me? Is this what you call foreplay? Yuck!

But you know no better, so I have to forgive you all.

Coming from me, not a millennial, the future is a big fucking disappointment. But the millennials don't give a fuck enough to change it. Indifference has ruined the planet, but regardless, I hope you all have a very blessed life. And remember to give other people love when you can. ♡

I have learned in my time of blogging (ranting really) that it's better to be For things, like goodness and love than to be against things, like the nasty Nazis who've infiltrated everything. They're all mind controlled zombies and they will eventually stop their silly behavior, because it is all very silly and pointless in the end.

There is a game on this planet; the duality game, and it's always good Vs. evil, but evil disguises itself as good and the evil represented is something that eventually gets discarded for another false threat. It's a game and a tired one, we need to evolve and become free. Divine goodness and divine love baby, no compromising! Learn to discern.

Stay true.

Monday, July 7, 2014

90s Nostalgia

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The 90s: When country music was extremely popular, when people stopped wearing much makeup and it was about the natural look, when things got as drab as ever and boring - I remember having to watch a Television show about a fishing company - when baggy clothing became the norm (YUCK). Culture-sample it all you want, there isn't much, thankfully.

If Andy Warhol was psychic he would have said: In the future everything you have seen before will be parodied, and anybody can be famous and then swiftly become unfamous, so it's not as important anymore.

It's not important at all. The Hollywood dream should have the 90s.

Success doesn't mean fame. Its unimportance is showcased on Television all the time by how miserable these people are when they have it, plus on the same note they still are glorifying it. Only because of their corporate masters. "I hate my fucking life, I can't go anywhere without being harassed! I always shop at -insert whatever here- to cheer me up, I just pay with my credit card!"


Let's change this brain pattern, let's evolve. Let's do New things.

Thursday, June 5, 2014

Inappropriate Boners

akward boners

This is why I don't like sports. No, I just don't like sports. They're so fucking gay! I'm never around guys and touch them like these so-called straight men do. So, quit calling Me a fag!

So anyway, it came to my attention by a girl that men get hard at the worst times. Maybe when there's fights going on, possibly, emotional stirs. Yes, it happens, boners happen.

I find it interesting that this girl who has an aversion to those bad-timing boners, bothers with men at all.

Don't all men get inappropriate boners? I do.

I used to get them when my girlfriend was crying, not out of incompassion, but because of the emotion emanating from her and her vulnerability -- possibly that the most -- and how I wanted to give her love and compassion. Love gives me a hard on. I'm happy it does too.

Well, I don't think I've had a boner at a funeral, but I'm sure the corpse isn't the only one in the room who is hard. Men get boners when they look at women in public all the time, so, it doesn't take much. And maybe that's why a lot of men wear baggy pants. Not because they look like a sad sack, but because they want to hide their boners.