The Results Are In (I Don't Have Aids, Shut Up)

Okay, so this is funny, I was looking at my stats, because the new Blogger has all that shit, most sites make it easier to check now, ya know, because I'm lazy and I don't really give a flying shit. So I looked out of boredom, honestly, I really don't care that much, I just hope somebody out there in Internet land gets something, anything out of my writing, whatever that may be. So to the point, the top keywords that get people to stumble upon my blog through Google are:

"three boobs" - that's a big hit.
"anal beeds" - of course, why not?
"natalie portman cameltoe - interesting.
"denham fouts" - very cool, famous male prostitute.
"natalie portman pussy' - okay, I get it, people want to see her stuff.
"painmurdersuffering.blogspot.com" - URL that.
"penis tumblr" - uh, alright, that makes a lot of sense (no).
"occult musicians' - nice.
"illuminati musicians" - nice.
"tumblr penis" - am I missing something?

Well, yeah, folks, whoever-the-hell you are, I've had this blog for awhile now, since 2009, since 9/11 of 2009 which holds significance to me. I've had a few ad offers, I told them to go shove it, of course, and I've been asked to write reviews for Virus Scanner shit, huh? Yeah, obviously I said fuck off. Actually I just said something confusing, I forget what it was, somethihng along the lines of, I think you're mom needs a Virus Scanner. Maybe that's what it was, forget. So there's been some laughs, and some tears, and I actually have another blog. I thought posting things from there onto here would be redundant, but maybe I will.

I have a tumblr, no tumblr penis though. For all you people interested in more occult stuff. But, it has more to offer, videos I've made and I don't know, just other shit. http://dystopianfiend.tumblr.com

And the United States has most of my audience, naturally, because Canada sucks. But we're not as in debt and other obvious facts. UK is third from Canada, and then it's Saudi Arabia, that's fucking weird. Next is Australia, Germany, India, Brazil, France, and lastly South Africa. I have no idea why, but hey.

Much love to my Saudi Arabians out there. Tons of love (send me a wife). And to the rest -- I don't really care.

UPDATE: Looks like my audiance keeps changing, Canada is a close second now, hmph. People are a bit slow going here.

The Whore Of Babylon

So, I was masturbating and I was thinking, man this is disgusting what I'm looking at, or man she's such a whore. But really she was just portraying a whore, like most of it is an illusion, it's an act. Sure, there's a dick in her and some guy later cums in her face, but most of it is total and utter bullshit, I'm sure she likes to be treated good, don't most girls? Yeah, it's just for money, yeah, but come on, it's tiresome, and really, like, disgusting, but maybe that's what's charming about it, I don't know.

Yeah, porn -- really-really charming, yeah, sure. Yeah.

Masturbation is kind of addictive, I try to avoid it sometimes, I take breaks. Whore's get fucked constantly, and play with themselves all the time I guess. Or just get fucked. I don't have any adoration for whores. Love actually turns me on most, gives me a hard on, hard on for love. That's me. None of this greasey shit, this spectacle of testical, why did I ryhme that? Testicals, yeah. Ball-mashing, is that any fun? It actually gets pretty sore.

What is this thing? -- Sex. God, I wish I didn't need it. It's a real disturbance being horny and having no one to have sex with. And going out and finding it is a pain. I'm already horny now, it can't really wait, like, sorry honey but I want my dick in your mouth before dinner. Fuck dinner, well fuck my dick I mean.

So the Whore of Babylon, what's she all about? She's the Harlot who rides the beast of Revelations, if the bible holds any water to you then that means you give a shit. Lady GaGa had her on her mind with her style of course, which is...I guess, not very surprising. "I'm a whore, check it out! I'm the Whore of Babylon." Babylon just means wicked city, or confusion. We're in global Babylon now. So a girl being a whore or a slut, big fucking deal right? Pornstars are paid prostitutes, oldest profession in the world. But is it a respectful one? Maybe in their community it is, it's a wicked world after all. People get praised for their immoral deeds. What's moral in our world when everything is backwards, and when we're being demoralized by society and Television, Eh? No answer? Cheating is a popular topic for T.V. shows and in movies, man do I ever hate that. It's not cool, but a girl who falls for another guy is also not cool. If every girl will fall for somebody else, what is the fucking point of the man? Are we just Appetizers? Snacks? For the time being. Why even bother at all with someone who finds interest in everyone else? I'm not saying a totally possessive relationship, or person is better, I just mean, have some decency, don't lead men on (girls) if you are going to find someone else. The thing is, the response would be from a girl I mean, "how am I suppose to know? It just happens." Well, tell them to eat shit, be loyal to your lover. And you're just going to find somebody else again, so stop being such a parasite. Moving from host to host, bah. That's how diseases are spread, but you are the disease really.

Yeah, I'm bitter, why shouldn't I be? People are lousy. And maybe whores are more fun, they're painfully transparant. We fuck, then we stop, then okay, bye, then she fucks somebody else. Ugh, ew. Nevermind.

"And the woman was arrayed in purple and scarlet colour, and decked with gold and precious stones and pearls, having a golden cup in her hand full of abominations and filthiness of her fornication:
And upon her forehead was a name written a mystery: BABYLON THE GREAT, THE MOTHER OF HARLOTS AND ABOMINATIONS OF THE EARTH."

Did I just quote the bible? Oh my god -- literally.

Relationblips

Hello, hello whoever is reading this. I love you (said softly). Whatever happened to a relationship that worked out? I don't know. Mine lasted a year, and guess what? She gave up, not me. I tried pleading, and all of that, but to no avail. Our relationship became toxic, that's what she said - that's what she said. Anyway, uh, hm, I never got to see her very much, I feel a bit cheated out of a whole and complete relationship. We were more like fuck buddies who loved each other. The sex was good, but I was good, so sex can be good always if I am. All the girl has to do to be good at sex is suck dick good. What else do they do? Move their pelvic muscles in sync properly? Turn on occasion? Do they talk dirty? None that I have fucked. I'm good in bed because of stamina and doing what makes them orgasm, what makes it happen. My orgasms suck in comparison, I'm jealous, always, always jealous of theirs. What the fuck is the point of me cumming? I sometimes think to myself, if it won't be that great anyway. The payoff for me isn't that fantastic. Masturbating is a bit dead to me, but I have to do it occasionally. I have this bummed out feeling when I think, that's it? That's all? Shows over? That's the feeling? Pathetic. When I'm happy I think when I cum it feels a lot better. When I'm horny, I love to stuff a girl, for awhile. Apparently my dick hurts girls when I deep-dick them. Which is merely me putting my dick all the way in. Sorry, vaginal wall. I was looking at the silhouette of my dick, my cock, I like saying cock better, and it looked awesome. The silhouette of my cock, and it going into a vagina. Some weird angle, and interesting lighting. Nice. Kind of an art-thing, or just a whatever thing, but I was admiring it.

So something interesting happened, disregarding my year long relationship, because it was almost insignificant, because she was always busy and would come to my place and use my shower and sleep in my bed and then we'd argue about something. AWESOME. What happened to me was I fell for someone else, in the time she wanted space. Literally just a week. I called up my old friend, that I hadn't talked to in like a year and a half. Let's watch a movie, or something, hangout, and do my tarot reading. Which I totally appreciated. Anyway, long story short, we had a lot of sex and it was really fun. She showed me she cared quite a lot, and she was very comforting and nurturing, something that I haven't felt in a long time. My ex -- forget it. Her ability to show emotion and care for me was very weak, and needed so much work, and the fact that I had to tell her things was a sign right there not to bother. I couldn't fuck the emotions into her, so..yeah.

If you ever request rim-jobs, for your asshole to be licked by your girlfriend, and if she doesn't seem to want to, then she'll probably break up with you. That's what happened to me. Words of wisdom, words to live by. Whatever.