Date Rapists (Anonymous)

They're assholes right?

That's not nice, drugging the sweet girl, not so sweet after. I'm reminded of the scene in Twin Peeks: Fire Walk With Me when Sarah Palmer's in a brothel with her friend, and her friend gets her drink spiked, and then she's somewhat raped. Well, maybe not so raped, she's kind of into it, they both are. The room's all sexed, and smeared with it. Raunchy. Then Sarah goes mental with her tits hanging out. End scene.

Uh, in real life it's not so, I don't know, safe. Because they get away. Even though Sarah Palmer's raped by her father..for many years. I was almost raped by an African guy in the park once, he had his hands down my pants, and he was fingering my ass. I'm like, how did I get into this situation? Oh yeah, I'm incredibly drunk, and making out with an African dude. But Why? I thought, doesn't Aids come from where you guys are? I was kind of reconcidering this. I don't even know how the hell I got into a park. I think I blacked out and woke up there. He then suddenly whipped out his cock, to show it to me, and he made me touch it. I thought it was kind of funny, then he got a bit aggressive so I shoved him down, and then this security guard came and asked what was going on. I said, "uh, we're just talking here. We're leaving, or I'm leaving. Fuck off black guy!" My friends were worried about me that night. Yeah, I've heard stories from girls about getting roofied, but I could never tell if I was or not, because I pretty much just black out when I drink too much anyway. I guess I could be laying on my stomach somewhere with my naked ass in the air..in a park. And I guess I wouldn't know that until later.

"Nice naked guy, can I fuck him? How much?"

Sssshit, I hope my friends don't sell my body when I'm passed out. "Hey, uh, were you my pimp last night?" Fuck. Uhmm, yeah, girls getting raped is kind of bad, gay guys getting raped is kind of bad too, except sometimes they like it. I think it sucks just not remembering sex at all.

Vagina Assassins

So a friend of mine was telling me that when he was in Thailand he went to a bar called Super Pussy in a part of town called Patpong -- funny because the ping-pong ball pussy trick is a regular attraction there -- he says that these Thai girls were also shooting darts out of their pussy holes, and hitting targets and balloons. At first I was like, holy shit, this would make a pretty lethal women here, and one dangerous vagina. It got me thinking, this should have been in a James Bond movie. I would say, Pussy Galore comes to mind, but she was too lame. She had female minions who just got slapped around, and shoved around, and they kissed the shag carpeted floor. If only Sean Connery would have been caught with a dart launched at him when he spread out his formidable lay. I don't know, maybe about fifteen minutes into the movie he'd be dead already, with a poison pussy dart. There's so many fucking possibilities, what else could she shoot out of there a grenade?

Another interesting, and pretty nasty thing that my friend said the female/ and shemale performers did was that they would open up bottles of beer for people with their cunts. Ya know, as much as I don't like STD's I would also prefer not drinking them off my beer. Uh, beer transmitted disease? It's Aids beer, keep away from that! I don't really know if you can get Aids off a bottle of beer, but I really wouldn't want to find out.

They also smoked cigars with their holy of holies, and would write down your name on a piece of paper with a magic marker. Fantastic. Thanks, I'll get them to write down the name of my mom. Yeah, it's not really a choice gift idea for mom.