I Like Beer

I've devoted an entire post to beer. Ha. It's my soft kill drug of choice. When I say "soft kill" I mean like how the government adds fluoride to your tap water to kill your immune system gradually, and how preservatives and other chemicals are put in our food to do the exact same thing. And booze will destroy my liver, but at least I do that on purpose. It's nice to know just whose killing me, and it's me, hey-hey.

Beer's great, it's never really done me wrong. I blackout from hard liquor now, so I'm off that. I'd have to have a babysitter with me, girlfriends are good substitutes for that. Too bad I'm not going to have one for awhile, they just end up being my drinking buddy, or were they always? And why do I get concerned about them when they drink too much? I guess I'm a hypocrit. Anyway, I've probably broken up with them because of beer, and how I wanted to persue drinking more to not think. Please, I hope.

I really love beer from the tap, and if it's really fresh. Drinking longer than a month old beer is fucking gross, it taste burnt I find, and well, like shit. I used to work in a bar, so fresh beer gives me a boner.

You know those big titted blonde chicks you see in ads or commercials, and like how they're holding two pitchers of beer in their hands, and they're wearing super tight t-shirts, and making the whole drinking motif all sexual? Yeah, that, uh, I find that really annoying. Sexy is fine, but just give me the beer, and go away, I am talking philosophy with my friend. I don't know why, but getting fucked up sometimes makes me existential, I guess mainly my existentialst crisis peeks out, and slaps me in the face, but lucky for me I'm all numb and I can handle it. What's life? What's going on with mine? Eh, let's just have another beer. Maybe a lot more. I wish being hungover was fun, I get very creative when I'm hungover, I'm so clear of mind, and able to asert my thoughts properly even though I feel like ass. The last time I was really hungover I spent most of the day in the shower, I think because I was too weak to get out of it. I find most of my drinking friends past out in their homes, on their couch, or on the floor, and I find it really cute. But seeing a girl whose an alcoholic is kind of lame, and depressing to me, I guess that's how I look to women though. But I think I rock that shit.

Without further ado, uh, my favorite type of beer is probably pale ale, althought I am a fan of lager, preferably honey lager. And can beer is fine, but I haven't found my favorite yet. I'm not into Budweiser, it gives me a headache, but I was really into Corna beer in the summer of 08. But now I think it tastes like fucking skunk cabbage, and smells like it. Here, smell my beer, does it smell disgusting? Okay, I'm not insane.