When I Jerk-Off I Think Of..You?

Today while I was masturbating I found it difficult to do, because I'm pretty hungover. A friend of mine, she says that she has trouble getting a good rhythm going, and it's hard for her to orgasm when she's hungover. Yeah, it takes a lot out of me to get to that special, warm, and fuzzy place. Cloud 9, which is actually just a large wad of semen, maybe.

It's so much better if you fill your ass with some lubricant, and play around with your butt-hole before you ejaculate. I don't know, some times I masturbate after having sex, because only I really know how to properly touch myself. That's why God gave us hands. My mom actually told me that, gross. What else are they used for? Everything? Nah, just masturbation. When I masturbated today I noticed that one of my balls was pushed up, and I was wondering why it felt a bit different, but good too. Probably better. Is this a secret I've found? My friend told me once to twist my sack, and it would feel better. It didn't. But this ball lodging thing seemed promising.

I'm just reminded of my nuts all fancy free being mashed into a girl's body while my cock is inside of her. Another friend of mine says she likes the feeling of when testicals are slapping all around her. Cool, I guess. If you fucked a girl upside down, and had your balls rest on their hood, it could have clit stimulation, I don't know. I haven't tried it. Or maybe I have, I don't fucking remember. I just use my hand, my magic touch. Mom says.

You know I try not to think of mom usually, but thinking about not thinking about it usually makes her pop into my head. Pop my head? What? -- Anyway -- sometimes it's hard to imagine something that turns me on, but the typical stuff. It's really quite fucking boring, and I yawn, and sometimes fall asleep instead of finishing. I'll do it later, just like my laundry, or taking out my garbage. Ugh, when did it become a chore? Stupid dick, I'm tired of you. I'd like to not care. I hate being programmed to want to fuck. I feel I have no choice, because you know that I'll have a wet dream eventually. I'm sure celibate people have wet dreams, I think it still counts as sex. Define reality first, then tell me I'm not actually having sex in my dreams. I was getting a blow job last night in my dream, but it was about as eventful as in real life. So what.